Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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