I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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