Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
