weddingsv make me drug and hornr
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
The power of my boobs compel you
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
