All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize