Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
