What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
