420 ftw
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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