I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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