the day after is always just damage control
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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