do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
