so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
