Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
