Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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