wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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