Where did you get a picture of my penis
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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