haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
farters have to be the big spoon...
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
