i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I want a musical about memes.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
