you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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