it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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