They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
