i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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