I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
