okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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