I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
