i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
