I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
