i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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