Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I love having hate sex.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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