Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
