I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
