That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
