dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Randomize
