Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
