But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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