who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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