You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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