normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize
