Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
