does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
