I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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