He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
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