omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
