I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
