I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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