I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
