Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
