im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
