There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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