And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
